and there it went.

it's been awhile. i've been busy studying for my exams.

and then pherbe had a cold on tuesday. i noticed something was wrong with him cuz he din eat his food when i put it in the cage. usually, he would be the first to eat all the food up. but instead, he sat there looking upwards. i had to rush. rushed to my exam in the morning. the first thing i did when i got home was to check on him. he was still sitting at one corner n looking up. i tot maybe it was a little bored so i let the rabbits out in the garden. and i sat outside watching them. pherbe would usually run all around n start eating the plants. but instead, it sat behind me and looked upwards. my bro n i joked. maybe his cage is a little smelly so he looked upwards. so i decided fine, i'll change the bedding, wash the cage and bathe him. and so i did. but while i was bathing him, he was struggling to climb to my shoulder.. and looked upwards. he was struggling to breathe. i was freaked out and rushed him to the vet. the vet scolded me for bathing for him cuz he had a cold. she said "rabbits can die of respiratory problems..." and how was i to know? i wouldn't be there if i knew he had a cold. i would jus buy the medicine. hearing her say that cost me 35 bucks.

so that night, i kept it in my room and placed a towel over the cage so it wouldn't be so cold. and since it wasn't eating, i had to force feed it or it will really die. i had to do it every hour.. but it looked a little stressed so i fed it less frequent. that's what they ask me to do. and on the third time, it was 1am. and i was about to sleep cuz i had a paper at9 which meant i had to wake up at 7.. and i promised to be in sch at 815. which meant i had to wake up at 615. and so i tot, i better feed it before i sleep otherwise it wunt have food the whole night. so i fed like one quarter of what i'm supposed to.. and it was not breathing very well. i tot maybe i'll try what the vet suggested n put a little bit of vicks to help the congestion. so i sat at my table. placed pherbe on the table so i can get the vicks. but as soon as i did that, it flopped on my table. it scrambled on the table, flopped to the side and was twitching. i helped it on its paws but it jus flopped. after 3 secs, it stopped breathing.

i called the emergency line. (thinking they can help) i was seriously lost. i din expect it at all. and it happened all too quickly. and so i said "help! my rabbit is gonna stop breathing. what do i do now?" and the guy said "may i know what's ur name, what's ur contact number, which clinic do u go to? what's the name of the vet u saw? i'll get a doctor to call u back?" GREAT. trust him to do that.

and then he got an overseas doctor to call me back. like what can he do. and this doc asked me "so which vet did u see? dun cry. call the emergency line back n tell them u're looking for dr nathan." fine.

i did that and the same guy picked up. and he asked "what's ur name, who are u looking for? what happened? which clinic did u go to?" and i said get me dr nathan now. and he "ok.. what's ur contact number, i'll msg her and get her to call u back asap?" bloody asshole!

and then after a million years, dr nathan called back. but it din matter anymore.

Pherbe died.

there it laid.. still on my table. its eyes were wide open. its mouth was sligthly open. and it was looking upwards. its paws were all soft. and then its head became cold.

i refuse to admit it. but i guess i have to. thanx to lionel n sam who helped my bury it. and to my sis, thanx for being there for me at that time. even though u were so tired n all. and i wunt be seeing u for 4.5mths.. i'm sorry that the last time we see each other till aug will be on such a sad note.

and to pherbe. i hope u will be happy in rabbit heaven. i love u so much and i miss u dearly. i will never forget the happy times u spent doing "binky"s in the garden, trying to snuggle under pheebe. and sprinting ard the garden.





i only wish that while it was alive, it was a happy bunny. that's all i can hope for.